Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
