at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
