I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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