Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
