Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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