I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
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