I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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