I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize