her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize