If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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