chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I can't put those talents on a resume
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize