Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Randomize
