Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
