3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
