what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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