I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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