So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
