Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
