who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
