Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
