I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
