that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
