"it" just moved
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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