What did we do last night that was yellow?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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