Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Randomize
