I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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