I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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