I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
