How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
