at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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