i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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