Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
