first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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