I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize