You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
God I need to hump something, right now.
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