Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
my shit smells like andre
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
