i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
