This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
