What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
