you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
