the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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