office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
