We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
