school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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