so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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