She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
