Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize