Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
