It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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