Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
We need to rekindle our bromance
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
