I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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